Today is a special day for me. It is both my anniversary and my youngest son's birthday. Yesterday evening my husband asked if I was excited about today. At first I didn't know what he was talking about, which I think might have hurt his feelings.
I didn't mean to, and I had to apologize again this morning for seeming so callous. There's a reason why it didn't ding with me right away. I was never a big wedding person (obviously as it took 10 years before I'd get married). So, the anniversary is not really the highlight of my year.
What is that highlight is the daily gift that my marriage brings to me. I know I don't show it well. I can write down emotions and feelings, but verbalizing them is a WHOLE other potato that doesn't bake well with me.
Every day is more important than the one day a year, because whether I've had a bad day or a good day, I know that my husband will be my champion. He'll try to fix what's wrong (even if all I need is an ear) and he'll try to make me happy when I'm sad or upset. He understands my faults and my demons and loves me anyways.
I can see that love when he's riding my waves of irritation, moodiness, or introversion. I can see that love when we're doing nothing but riding the boat up and down the river in complete silence. I can see that love when the four kids are all talking at dinner and he and I share a look across the table.
I love him.
I love him more than he'll ever understand because I can't verbalize or write it well enough. I love it when he's grouchy. I love it when he laughs and tells his stories. I love that he'd take on 3 criminals just to get a friend's bike back. I love that sense of home and place he helped teach my gypsy soul. And, I love that he'll stretch out of his comfort zone to share adventures with me. I love that we'll both geek out over late night B movies.
Most of all, I love that even when he's not around I am comforted and strengthened by his presence and the love we have for each other.
So, as I do every year (a day late sometimes), I'll get him a gift and a card that won't express enough how much I love him and inside I'll know that we'll have a lifetime of anniversaries because we were meant to be together forever.
True love really does exist.